Shari Criso | ,| By
Ever wished that you had two extra hands, more hours in the day, the ability to be in two places at the same time? Well, you are not alone!
This feeling of not being able to get it all done is not only common, but I would say almost universal, especially as we try to establish that elusive balance of work/career and personal/family life.
Of course it is not possible to make the day longer, clone ourselves or add on a few extra appendages in order to be more productive, get it all done and spend more quality time doing what we love…but this is only an impossibility if we are trying to do everything ourselves and not asking or even hiring support or help.
One of the hardest things for some of us is to know our own limitations and seek support outside of ourselves in order to live our lives more fully. There are different reasons why we may be creating these do-it-yourself situations, but regardless of why we do it or what we are getting out of it, the result is usually the same.
Be honest about what is blocking you from getting the support you need. Some of us pride ourselves on how “independent” we can be and how “self sufficient” we are, juggling all the balls in the air at the same time. The problem in this is that while our egos may be getting a quick high from feeling super-human for the moment, we create difficulty for ourselves from the disappointment, exhaustion and lack of stamina that is necessary to keep that pace.
It may also be the feeling that there is nobody to ask or the money needed to hire the extra help…or that you can never really trust anyone to do it “the way you would do it”.
When I finally allowed myself to look honestly at how many things in my own life I was holding on to doing myself, not because it was necessary, but because I was controlling…I was able to create so much more freedom!
Take an inventory of all of the things that you are doing in your life and all the things you are not, but want to make time for. There are some things that you are doing or taking care of that are necessary for you to complete…and there are other things that you are doing in your life that are really just a way to control and not trust that someone else can help.
The best place to start is to make a list of all the different tasks, responsibilities and actions that you do in your life right now. Honestly ask yourself, do I really have to do this myself or is it something that I can delegate, ask for support or hire out?
Some things, like spending quality time with your children, exercising, sleeping, or taking care of your special responsibilities of your work or business are obviously not things that you can delegate…but you will be surprised by how many other things you have on your list that can! This is the place to start.
Be creative, look for alternatives and the amazing resources that are available to you. Our ideas about HOW the support will come or what we have available to us may be limited by our preconceived beliefs. Look for services and other resources that can easily be utilized to free up much of your time.
One great example is the many food markets that offer online ordering and even delivery…I really HATE food shopping and the time that it would take to drive there, shop, pack it in my car and then carry all the heavy bags into my kitchen. Using this service allows me to quickly fill my “cart” online (it even remembers my favorites and previous carts) and just schedule a time to have my groceries delivered right into my kitchen! This not only saved me the energy and the time, it actually saves me money by not walking around picking up extra stuff I did not need!
Being open to getting support in your life for what IS necessary, will also inevitably bring awareness to the things that are NOT, which will help you let go of them altogether.
There are no special awards for being the most independent or doing it all alone…but letting go and getting the support you need can and will create amazing rewards and results in your life.