The other day, out of the blue, I received a networking email from someone that I don’t know. When I read through the content of this email, I was impressed. So impressed, that I am going to share it with you all right now. The writer’s name has been deleted for privacy reasons, but the majority of the letter below is in the original format. I’ve also included some notes in bold italics to point out what this person did well. Learn from this well-written email and avoid these annoying emailing mistakes.
HOW TO WRITE A NETWORKING EMAIL TO SOMEONE YOU DON’T KNOW
Sent: Monday, September 23, 2013
To: Smedstad, Shannon
Subject: Networking help for HR in Washington DC area? << Compelling subject line with context is important!
Hi Shannon – << Personalized! Didn’t start with “to whom it may concern.”
First, thank you for accepting my LinkedIn invitation a few weeks ago. I found your profile while I was researching COMPANY as part of my job search (I’m an HR Leader / Business Partner), and I was really impressed by the wide range of HR & Recruitment accomplishments you’ve included in the profile. << Shows some research and gets at the ego a bit. 🙂
Today I’m writing to you because I’m working on expanding my network in the Washington DC region, and I was wondering if you may be willing to help me? I realize that your profile says you’re based in PA, but I’m certain that with the multiple relationships that you have within the HR community, there may be one or two DC-based HR professionals that you know who may be interested in actively building their networks too. << Nice, genuine … isn’t over the top, and again provides some context.
I’m an HR leader with XX years of experience across multiple industries. Much of my experience has been built upon successful HR Business Partner roles with US and European teams, supporting talent management, employee relations, and coaching for executive leadership teams. My approach to delivering solid HR services focuses on first understanding the key business challenges before working with key stakeholders to develop simple, flexible solutions that create opportunities for leaders to make their own choices about investments and risks. << Good, quick overview, gives the reader something to go on.
Based on this, who might you be able to recommend that I should connect with?
Finally, while I’m asking for help – can I also ask if I can help you in some way? Perhaps your team is looking for key roles in the DC market where my own network may be of assistance (for free of course – to be clear…I’m not pitching recruitment services)? << Offers to return the favor and provide value back!
LinkedIn link was provided
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THIS APPROACH?
Obviously I thought this was a great example of a well thought out email. But, what do you think? Would this have gotten your attention?